Is an ineffable relationship so hard to manage? Seriously, i can take it no more. I don't know what you want, i don't know what to do to make you feel happy. It heartache me seeing our relationship get ruin by me. Yes, my fault again. Blame it on me, my carelessness, my attitude. Yes, me me me, its always me and never you. I'm trying my very best to change, to get along with you. Tolerating everything you say, even though i'm not happy with it, or not satisfy with it, i still must accept it just to make you happy and find lesser chance for us to quarrel. I don't want us to quarrel everytime and break off just like this. Doesn't allowing me to contact with guys, i accepted it, but you got to know, if i don't talk to them, who am i going to talk to? The wall? Or my hamster? Who can be there when i'm down and need someone to talk to when you're busy or working? Who can i share things with? Nobody. I know you dislike it, but i ought to have some friends. Can't you just understand it? I'm all alone from young till now, i don't have any siblings to play with unlike other kids, my family aren't united, not as if you don't know. You dislike me scolding vulgarities, i know, its for my own good, but you're the one who taught me this, i learnt from you. You asked me to change, it takes time. Maybe to you, i haven't seems to change alot, but you'll see the results sooner or later. I'm always late for meet ups, why? Because you wanted to meet at Tamp, Hougang, those far places from my house, and you leave house when i'm just done bathing, what do you expect? Mydear, think carefully, am i far too much? Why not you come to Cck to look for me instead? Do you know its very tiring travelling here and there, i didn't say anything and even offered to go down to Hougang to look for you myself. Perhaps i'm really a bad girlf as you said, i admit, i usually don't show my love out and acted as if i don't care, but deep down in my heart, i actually care alot, and my love for you is ineffable. The care and love for you and my friends are equally same, i don't forsake my friends just because i have a stead, i don't. You can get along with my friends if you know them well, they're not as bad as you thought. I've alr lose you once, i don't hope for a second time. I actually wonders where do i stand in you for a very long time, but i knew it today, i'm not important to you, am i? One vulgar can even lead you to wanting for a break up, what does this means? I'm no longer important to you, yes? You threw temper at me for nothing, i didn't even mumble a single word, instead just kept quiet and pretend nothing happened. Why do i do this for? I don't know, i really don't know. I just don't want to quarrel with you, it won't lead us to anywhere. Yes, i admit i got a fuck up attitude, but i'm willing to change, i just need time. I don't think you know how i feel, till you lost someone who you cherish the most.
I don't know what will happen next, i don't wish to know either. If we're inseparable, we'll be back together in months later, or perhaps years. I just hope your answer won't disappoint me, and lastly, i hope what comes out of your mouth next time won't hurt me so much, till the extent that i wanted to do silly stuffs. Perhaps we should really talk things out nicely.
Iloveyou, eternity.